-- writings on the wall

[chewbroccoli]

Somebody yelled his name in a loud voice, too loud to be sober, and Tony laughed without needing a reason. He got that way when he was drunk, or when he was coming down after a good high, walking off a hangover. He laughed a lot, when there was nothing even remotely laughable about his circumstances. Tony knew that he was the reason that he was in this pile of shit life. His hobbies were less than morally acceptable and there had been more than one instance where he could have, and should have, given it all up. But it was so much easier to keep on going the way that he had been for years now. The momentum that he had gained could not be undone, and he was fast on his way to a young death. No obituary in the paper, no gravestone to mark his existence… just an empty pair of shoes and a guitar pawned off in a shop somewhere along the beach. Shit, he hoped that if he died tomorrow somebody would save that. It was the only thing he owned that he cared about. Some wood and strings, marked up with Sharpie and taped together.

Tony had been playing this gig on the beach with his bandmates, up until an hour and a half ago. They finished up, per the arrangements that got them all paid, and took to drinking like they had been invited. The chances that they would get caught were slim; the party had enveloped a large portion of the beach. It was being thrown by some upscale assholes, the reason of which had eluded him. Tony didn’t ask about it and all that he cared about was that he was getting paid for dragging himself and all of the equipment a few miles to get there and set up. The four or five of them that came slipped in easily with the huge number of people that were milling around. As the night went on into the early morning, the crowd grew bigger with party crashers and people who were probably not invited, including many who had heard from Tony that security would be desperately lax. They stole the drinks and free canapés, rich food that they would not have acquired otherwise, and took off, cackling like villains. Tony laughed along with them, stealing a couple of beers and stumbling off along the shore by himself.

The beach was empty at that time of night. He wondered if he would still be on the beach when they opened up for real business in a couple of hours. He probably would. He had nothing else to do. He felt for the wad of cash in his pocket, a good amount for so short a performance, and the cigarettes that were nestled close to that cash. His two favorite things in his pocket, Tony smiled. The music and festivities drifting from the party scene faded as he kept walking, mindless to where he was going or what he was doing. It would have made more sense to stay with everyone back there, maybe enjoy the bonfire that they had made. He didn’t feel like it though. He had his moments of solitude, just like everyone else. Finishing one beer, he made sure that it was empty and threw it in a wide gesture far off towards the murky horizon that he could see, the farthest that the water went. Maybe it would hit a bird or something.


tagged: Angel

[ANGEL DREAM KING]

Her parents had offered to take the kids today. Angel needed to get out, and so she put her two huskies into the old red pick-up truck before getting in herself. She was so wired up, so broken, that she couldn't even think of anything to do which would be fun and loosen her up. Instead the only idea she got was to purchase some alcohol and head to the beach. There was so much on her plate, and Angel didn't know what to think about first or what to sort out first. Especially since that strange man had appeared at the mall offering her money in exchange for her considering to get out of prostitution. Considering. The guy had to be crazy. Sighing deeply she parked outside a small grocery store, bought a bottle of whiskey - her favourite alcoholic drink - and then carried on to the beach. Her father was a fan of whiskey which was where she had gotten her own love of the drink from. The stronger the better in her opinion. The taste was so good that for one second as it went down her throat it almost made her feel better. Almost.

Angel soon parked her beloved battered pick up truck at the beach and got out. She hadn't been parted from the pick up truck since she was sixteen years old. She hadn't parted with it ever. Even when her husband had offered to buy her a new car she had refused. All these years she had been working on the car and fixing it to keep it running. She was a pretty good mechanic actually which she got from fixing her father's car with him on a daily basis as a kid. Angel had actually had the pick up truck as long as she had one of the huskies - Lady, a white half siberian husky and timber wolf cross bitch with blue eyes. Lady's companion, the red purebred siberian husky with blue eyes bitch Ginger was a present from Angel's missing husband whom she suspected to be on a caribbean island with a young model. After all she had been cheated on before by her first love, and only other partner. She walked barefoot onto the beach, sitting down in the warm sand as the two huskies followed her with wagging tails.

She opened up the whiskey bottle, watching the two dogs bound into the ocean before downing a mouthful. It was about an hour later when the bottle was half empty that Angel felt something hit her head. She groaned out of pain only to notice a beer bottle just a few feet away. Fortunately Angel had a rather hard head and all that was there was a bruise. Still, it hurt quite a lot. Turning her head in the direction the bottle had come from she saw a man not too far away. She couldn't help but frown. Why would anyone throw anything at her? Just as she was about to yell at him she noticed both Lady and Ginger running towards the male barking happily. They were such friendly dogs. Unfortunately they were making Angel exert energy today. Reluctantly the firey red head forced herself to her feet before wandering over to the man with the bottle of whiskey still in her hand. She was going to keep her alcohol after all.

"You hit my head. Lady, Ginger, sit."

[chewbroccoli]

The hour that they had spent playing their own music and some shit that was requested, yelled at them while Tony smiled and nodded and improvised, had gone pretty well. He wasn’t shitfaced enough to find his natural talents at playing guitar and singing amputated. That was never exactly fun and luckily he had worked out how not to be swallowed by his drunkenness when he was promised money for playing a show or even just a couple of songs in a row. It would have been simple for him to get smashed early in the evening and do nothing more than flail away at his guitar, making nothing recognizable come out into the night. Tony had started playing guitar when he was in high school, or earlier, he couldn’t remember. And it was the only thing that he was confident with when it came to natural talent and something to rely on as a source of income. From time to time, he stole from people. He stole a lot from his friends when they didn’t notice him hanging around. He already spent a lot of time staying with his friends and eating their food, sleeping on their floors. He was pushing their hospitality by stealing money that he found lying around. But no one had given him shit for it. Not yet.

He whistled to himself as he walked down the beach. The light faded from the bonfire and the torches jammed into the sand. He was left with little more than the storefronts and rich houses that lined the beach. They were too far off to offer very much but at least he wasn’t walking in total darkness. With that thought, Tony closed his eyes and tossed his head back, imagining what it would have been like to actually see the stars and not just imagine them in his mind’s eye. City lights chased away stars more often than not. It was all the artificial light. Must have been off-putting for the stars, the epitome of natural light in the universe. As he kept walking, none too cautiously, tipping from side to side, Tony felt his grasp on reality slip in favor of whatever he happened to be drinking. And fake stars slipped in and out of his view until he finally opened his eyes and chuckled softly to himself. Drunk already, he must have been drinking more than he remembered. That was a fucking shame. Maybe he was developing a tolerance for the stuff. Wait, he laughed and shook his head, that couldn’t be right.

He must have zoned out because he heard the dogs when they were right in front of him, apparently having materialized out of the sand. Tony laughed and grinned widely, gesturing to the animals as they came running. He’d always liked dogs but he’d never had any himself. That wasn’t too hard to imagine. Tony had not had an actual address or place to live in the past few years. Pets were strictly off limits, unless they belonged to other people. He had a tendency to talk to animals, dogs included, as though they were human beings that could carry on conversations. Shifting his bottle from one hand to rest in the crook of his arm, Tony bent down to pet the two dogs, running around happily, as happily as he would have if he were a dog. He looked up at the approaching owner, a pretty girl holding her own bottle. His eyebrows raised characteristically at the newcomer, subtly looking her up and down. “Shit, did I?” Tony laughed at his mistake, shrugging it off. “S’my bad. You don’t look any worse for the ware. What’re ya doin’ out here so late anyways?”

[ANGEL DREAM KING]

"Drinking."

Angel responded, shrugging a little before glancing back down at the two dogs. Drinking. It didn't help but she drank anyway. She didn't know what else she was supposed to do. She had tried starting over. She had tried loving someone else. Nothing seemed to work though. No matter what she did or what she said everything always ended up falling apart around her. She was half expecting social workers to come for her children any day now considering how much bad luck she had suffered and endured throughout her life. She wasn't a bad person. She wasn't a slut. She wasn't a bitch. She was just a good girl who had been destroyed by the world. Where was her sanctuary? Was her prince who was supposed to wrap his big strong arms around her to make everything all right? She didn't know. She assumed in the arms of another woman - the bitchy and slutty model type. There was so many of them out there that they were probably half of the world's population. So many infact that the nice girls like Angel always ended up beaten up beyond all repair. How could it be fair that the villaness ended up with the prince? It wasn't, and yet, that was what happened every day.

With a sign on her lips she sat back down on the sand, right infront of the man, and then gave a nod to the two huskies to allow them to go play in the surf. Angel could remember a time where she had once been dazzled by nature's beauty. When she was sixteen she had been so excited about the world. She had believed in princes, soul mates, and that one day she would have a wonderful romance, it would all go well, he would propose, and they would have a happy marriage. That hadn't happened though. Despite the fact her parents had never gotten a decent job and apparently didn't know what contraception was they did have the perfect marriage. They had been childhood sweethearts. Together for life. They had lost their virginities with each other, and were still in love even now. Why hadn't it worked out that way for Angel? She didn't know. She supposed in the end she was just too revolting and had too many flaws for any man to bear.

"What are you doing out here?"

Angel responded, more out of politeness then anything, before downing another mouthful of whiskey. She sincereley hoped that her children never had to feel this pain and that they would find their soul mates. Hopefully this incessant bad luck stayed with her and didn't pass on to her babies. If she had any small portion of good luck then she prayed it let her keep the bad luck and it didn't pass on to her children. At least they should be spared if nothing else. Hearing barks Angel turned her head, trying to stop her eyes from watering up as they usually did when she drank and thought, only to spot both Lady and Ginger playing tag in the water. They were so happy. She envied them. She had considered breeding the dogs before everything fell apart but right now she could barely keep things together as they were. Puppies would have to wait. Besides, it wouldn't be fair anyway. Sighing she laid back on the sand and glanced up at the pitch black sky. So empty. Maybe she was just empty like the sky?